A Few of My (Not So) Favorite Things
This is a very unusual post for me. I try to be poetic and well organized in my writing. I start with an introduction, a story, something that affected me in a profound way. I culminate with a crescendo of meaningful and relatable examples and thoughts, and the conclusion is left for the readers to ponder and either love or hate, agree or disagree or simply make them think. Either way, I feel that I have accomplished my goal if either of the categories apply to my readers. I am never good at putting my mundane world feelings out there and complaining, ranting, or even trying to be funny.
In general, I am not a funny person, and I am not very relatable. My life resembles so many out there, yet it also sticks out like a sore thumb, and I am not sure how to make it more charming for the occasional blog reader who stumbles upon my website. So, this post is different. It is a list of things that I have accumulated from social media and by reading the news and books and through my real life accidental encounters. It is a list of things/ideas that I find so annoying that I have a physical reaction to them, like a shudder usually followed by a profanity. I understand that some social media users, casual news-readers, and humans, in general, may find these topics/themes/things endearing, they may find the items advertised or written about cool and worthwhile, I understand. We are all different. This is why I always try to curb my judgment, I try to be open-minded and understand that not everyone thinks the same, feels the same, values the same.
However, this is my blog, so I guess I am entitled to put my feelings out there.
1. Fake Mud Jeans - There was a post on Facebook, a link to the Nordstrom’s fake mud jeans yesterday (here it is reported in Washington Post ). I am reverting to my-savage-self asking -What the fxxk? The image speaks for itself. With a price tag of $425 I wonder who is fooling who - working people who made the Nordstrom designers think that indeed their labor in the garden, as a plumber, carpenter, is so cool, that everyone should look like this or a rich person who would try to look as if they just put in a hard day of work behind them. Either way – What the fxxk?
2. Goat Yoga – If you are not sure what this is please Google - People doing yoga with goats. I am sorry, I just don’t understand. To me, this belongs in the same category as doing yoga with babies or toddlers. Again, there is someone fooling someone here. How can you relax? What if your goat (your borrowed one, just for the class - I guess most people who do this do not own goats) poops on you during a downward dog? What if your baby poops? What if a toddler starts crying in the middle of the class? Really, I do not understand it.
3. Beer Yoga- Same category as the goat yoga, but without the possibility of someone pooping on you. You do a pose, and then you take a swig of beer. I don’t know. Sounds complicated and it could be embarrassing.
4. Generalization- I hate when people generalize things, feelings, political affiliations, moods, talent. And generalization I see is precisely why I never liked statistics. I understand the need for it, you have to be able to apply a mathematical rule to a set of data for easier processing and evaluation, but you are leaving a lot of individuals out there that cannot be categorized (exception to the rule and all). For example, I was reading a poem this morning. A wonderful, famous poet states that all poets peek at the age of 35. Very poetically I disagreed. Life experiences are different. You may have been living in a cave with no writing implements for the first thirty years of your life. You are discovering a new world, and you want to express yourself through poetry. You will not peek at 35.
You are a child of immigrants. You moved to this country not speaking English. You learned the language, and now you are putting your struggles and stories in a poetic form, using your newfound language, you want the write poems in English because they were born inside of you in English. You are thirty-five, finding your voice because your life was not a straight shot up, but a meandering river, broken in a few spots, so now you are getting into your flow, forging forward, you will not abruptly stop at 35. Hence, generalization sucks.
5. Political parties - I hate them. They try to put people into herds and yet there are so many individuals, their voices silenced for a collective chant. So many of us that agree on one political point tend to disagree on other points. I get why we have them, but on the other hand… Imagine you are in a grocery store about to purchase some fruit. A clerk comes over and bundles pears, apples, tomatoes (tomatoes are fruit btw), and on the other side she bundles oranges, lemons, grapefruit, and bananas and tells you to pick one bundle over another. You choose a bundle with apples and pears as you wanted to purchase some apples. She hands you a few tomatoes. You ask for apples. She tells you that you can only choose a bundle, but not a particular fruit within the bundle. You leave the store without apples. So, political parties suck too.
And my list continues, and in no particular order, here are some other candidates of my dislike.
6. Pure breed dogs - This is forced, like pure breed humans. I like the mutts.
7. Wars - I hate wars. They are cruel. They are never just. There is never a clear winner. It should never be the answer.
8. Organized religion - For centuries humans have been duped into following a strict set of rules to be saved. There is this authority (mostly fraternal authority, formed by a bunch of men who set the doctrine for the rest of us), that tells us what we should believe in, how we should behave, what we should wear, drink, feel. If I could choose, I would take slices of each religion, mix it all together and call it a morality school. This would bring lots of different people together and create an environment leading towards a dialogue for modern times. I mostly identify with a Bosnian-Islamic movement but do not trust or practice the nuances that I feel are just human inventions.
9. Flavored water – Don’t see the point.
10. Our societies disrespect for elderly - So much wisdom lost.
11. Treating children like friends - They have no capacity to be friends with adults. They terrorize us, and we need to fight back, especially toddlers.
12. Light friendships – Who has time? Focus on good friends and family (not all of the family because some family is not worth focusing on either).
13. Reality TV – I don’t even have words to describe how I feel about this.
And there are more, but I am afraid we would be here forever.
Now, if you disagree, great! If you know me personally, you can tell me about it -no hard feelings. If you don’t know me- drop me a note here - comment, share, and rant. Or, even better, make your personal list - trust me- it will make you feel better.